Nicole Thomte , LMFT

Nicole Thomte (pronouns she/her or they/them) is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist - LMFT - practicing in Minnesota who centers care on people and relationships that fall outside mainstream expectations. As an LMFT, Nicole brings training in working with individuals, couples, and families to create affirmative, sex-positive spaces for LGBTQIA+ communities, kink and BDSM practitioners, consensual nonmonogamy and polyamorous relationships, and other nontraditional relationship structures. Her work combines a solution-focused orientation with an intersectional feminist perspective to address stress, anxiety, relationship and intimacy concerns, trauma and grief, mood disorders, chronic illness and disability, and a broad range of sexual and identity-related matters.

Nicole describes her therapeutic stance as non-directive and exploratory, offering accepting presence, curiosity, and a sense of humor to help ease the pressures of daily life. She treats clients as the experts on their own experience and helps surface patterns and connections that may be hard to see in the midst of difficulty, preferring practical, strengths-based work over reliance on labels alone. Nicole also affirms asexual identities while maintaining a sex-positive approach for those seeking sex therapy.

Her path to therapy was a third career choice informed by long-term commitment to advocacy and direct service. Nicole began attending supervision groups and co-facilitating survivor groups with Gender Justice Nevada in November 2012, and she worked as a state intern in behavioral health beginning in 2013, serving people with complex health and access challenges until a hiatus in July 2018. She has extensive experience facilitating groups as well as providing individual, couples, and family therapy, and continues to advocate for people pushed to the margins of society.

Therapeutic Approaches and Online Care

Nicole draws on client-centered methods that emphasize empathy, unconditional respect, and collaboration; this approach helps clients explore their values, relationships, and identity at a pace that feels right for them and is useful for work around self-esteem, identity questions, and relationship dynamics.

She also uses solution-focused strategies that concentrate on clients' strengths and practical steps toward achievable goals; this work is often helpful for addressing stress, anxiety, relationship conflicts, and navigating life transitions by identifying what is already working and building from there.

Nicole incorporates cognitive behavioral techniques to help people notice and shift unhelpful thoughts and behaviors, which can support management of mood concerns, panic, and anxiety.

Finding the right mix of approaches is part of the therapeutic process and Nicole works collaboratively with each person to identify what fits their needs, goals, and preferences. Together they refine strategies and adjust direction as progress is made.

Online therapy with Nicole is offered through video calls, phone sessions, live chat, or text-based messaging, giving clients flexibility to engage in ways that suit their schedules and comfort levels. These options make it easier to maintain consistency in care, fit sessions into busy lives, and access support from where clients are located while working with licensed professionals and therapists who specialize in diverse identities and relationship forms.